Shadow's Essays

"Words are loaded pistols."Jean Paul Sartre ~ "The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say." Anais Nin

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Location: San Jose, Ca, United States

Sunday, April 08, 2007

#9. Riding Shotgun
Why some labels about M/s will never hold true.

Time goes by, and part of the growth and learning curve is accepting and celebrating the differences we find.

One of those is the differences in the way women in scene see themselves.


Girly subs.
Leather Women.
And more.

Within all of those labels and groups and subgroups there are worlds of differences.

Some of the problem is in the way people percieve us.

Some of my friends identify as the "Warrior Slave" paradigm. They are strong women. They are powerful women. They can and do kick butt and take names and are the equal of any man on the planet.

They none the less have found one man they will "submit" to.

Some Feel feminine. Some feel powerful. Some feel tough and boyish and light and happy and safe and not the least bit "submissive", even if there is one other person in their world they respectfully and with devotion demurr to on decisions that have been negotiated away.

As a matter of fact, a LOT of them feel that way- and so do the men who own/love/care for/hold the control end of the relationships.

That is not something you can say out loud in M/s land.

Somewhere along the way, a great many of the lifestyle committed members of society started looking "askance" at those of us that do not fit their "label" of what slave is.

Maybe we are biker chicks- except many of us are not into bikes. But we fit that mode of "freedom and independence" within a relationship.

Maybe we are Amazon women- expect we like and respect and SUBMIT our WILL to men.

Maybe we are Native American women, fighting along side the men.

Maybe not. We ARE smart, in control, responsible people with more than enough brains and brawn to take down a small gang riot without calling out for help.

Our men understand this. They see that what they want is NOT someone who is easy to control or "handle". The sadists and Dominants and strong healthy men that are drawn to us want a challenge, want something special and hard to understand, something that is not available to just anyone. They are looking for partners, not just fuck toys, not just wives, not just playmates or a great cocksucking, eyebatting, ass wheedling, big tittied cutie in a great corset.

Sometimes, they don't even LIKE the corsets. But they often really enjoy sitting back on the sidelines and watching us "take out" our problems. They sometimes give off a little smile when they see some naieve dom-wanna-be get too smart for their own good. They like a woman who can hold her liquor, load her own shotgun, or throw her own whip.

It adds to the power they control. It adds to the possibilities they can explore. It offers them a deputy when things get rough. It gives them more.

"you’re like a loaded weapon that I have a permit to carry.”

That might be one of the coolest things i have ever heard said about one of my sisters out there in M/s land. It is a sign of respect for her independence. It is a HUGE sign of just how self assured and confident the man is.
It means that HE is not intimidated by HER. That makes HIM even sexier!

"I do not fight her fights, I clean up her messes."
D. speaking about a. , her 357. smith and wesson, and her temperment.

That is a man that likes a woman with spirit.
Now, men SAY that all the time, but what they often want is the "kitten with a whip" kinda babes that are all wet lipped and over boobed.

So what about the warriors, the spirits, the strong willed primal beasts that walk in leather and denim and don't like glitter and won't bat their eyes even at the threat of death?

We need to cherish them more, and understand the slavery they bring to their relationships is often MORE intense, HARDER to give, and sweeter to their partners.

They are women that do not say "Yes Sir" lightly.

They are women that do not defer to others before they have earned it.

They are women that have found their place with another only after a long time searching their souls. Leaning on someone else is not in their nature. Doing it "his way" is not their first choice. This is not a paradigm they wore near the skin or soemthing that their friends in elementary school could predict. It is not something obvious in their nature. It is a deeper well they drink from.

"Words are loaded pistols." (-Jean-Paul Sartre, writer and philosopher(1905-1980), and none are more loaded than "submission" and "slavery". Service is not submission. Slavery is not submission. And while they DO submit to the desires of the partners they obey and respect, they are not submissives.
They are the women that will run TO the sound of gunfire.
They are sheathed in emotional steel and fire, and the choices they make would break lesser beings.
They are the women i want standing on the hill with me at the end of days.

The men that are drawn to them will forever be on alert, for these women are not ones to slow down, make things easy, or give in if they are right. For the partner that dares to hold the leash, they will give their lives.

For some interesting sites that offer more to think about, try these:

Essays on a life of P.E.
April 7th, 2007
by shadow

Copyright Strong Eagle's shadow, April 7th, 2007
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